


You're the Salt in My Coffee

by madamguillotine



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Feuilly is intense, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, gross coffee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-03-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:49:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23080444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madamguillotine/pseuds/madamguillotine
Summary: When Bossuet and Bahorel start a janitorial job together, they get up to some shenanigans and Feuilly gets dragged along for the ride
Relationships: Bahorel & Bossuet Laigle, Bahorel/Feuilly (Les Misérables)
Kudos: 7





	You're the Salt in My Coffee

Bossuet and Bahorel. Bahorel and Bossuet. However it was you said it, they were a "dynamic duo". Despite this profound and iron friendship, they're favourite activity was to make the other miserable. Not unhappy, but miserable.

Typically there was nothing more harmful than bucket on the door, although this did backfire once when Bossuet opened the door and the bucket just dropped, knocking him out, without the bucket emptying on him. Which was both a great stroke of luck and a concussion at the same time.

After a summer marathon of the _Legally Blonde_ movies every week, as many of those who watch those movies are want to do, decided the next year they would take Law in September. They, of course, were the source of comedy in the class. They got decent marks and decided that that's what they'd pursue at university. When they left the program to pursue other goals, the company that employed them didn't want to let them go, so they were put on the janitorial staff.

They were assigned to the 7th and 8th floors. On their first day, they were lead around by a tall, gangly, loosely muscled, and gingered creature named Feuilly, who had been working there since they would have him. Although, for Bossuet and Bahorel, the boss's eyes were finally off them and as long as they weren't obvious about it, they could still make each other miserable.

When Bahorel found out that Bossuet had been put on bathrooms, he put a picture of Nicolas Cage in every stall in the bathroom. The first time he found the picture staring at him, he let out a small scream after which Bahorel could be heard laughing on the other side of the empty, and therefore echoing, building. Feuilly snickered lightly, nearly silently, trying to keep himself viewed as not just aloof but in charge.

Bossuet knew he could not let this go unnoticed or unretaliated. So, before work he went to a dollar store and bought all the tiny plastic army men, dinosaurs, and all the similar figurines he could find. When he supposed that he had forgotten the Nick Cage prank, he went in early to tape them all over his cart and on the inside of his locker. To his satisfaction, Bahorel let out the least manly of screams. Bossuet smiled innocently, though they both thought they heard a snort coming from the break room. Bahorel could not, would not allow this to stand. He had no ideas yet, but hoped it would come to him.

The next day, Bahorel arrived just in time for their paths to cross, Bahorel going in and Feuilly and Bossuet coming out. He spied the cup of black coffee and knew what to do. He took the salt and shook hard a few times into the cup.

Feuilly came back and, to Bahorel's horror, took a sip. His eyes widened as he swallowed but looked at Bahorel's face. He calmly set the mug down, grabbed the pepper and shook some in. He put it to his lips and and started drinking, staring unblinkingly at him. He finished it and set it down, still stone faced.

“That was the most hardcore thing I've ever seen... Marry me?” Bahorel said, agape.

Feuilly laughed heartily.

“Let's try coffee first,” he smiled


End file.
